Word to your Mummy

At the frontline of middle class parenting

Heartburn

We are spending an incredibly treaty, relaxing and, dare I say, adult few days at Babington House. I realise how this makes me sound; rich, hipster, thin. I am six months pregnant and am getting close to the “Mr Greedy in profile” stage. I am red in the face a lot. I bob to the loo every ten minutes and the extra vitamins I take ensure I sprout hair with […]

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Domesticity

A single friend has received a text from a man she is seeing. Without betraying any confidences it is pretty clear that this man is extremely interested to see her later on this weekend. His text is warm, witty and slightly erotic. She is giddy and keeps glancing down at the phone nervously. She dismisses my jealousy explaining that she would rather an established relationship thus avoiding the dizzying highs […]

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Wine Glasses

My husband has broken one of the new John Lewis Michelangelo 250 ml glasses (suitable for Red / White wine). The disappointment is heightened as not only were they were new, in a kitchen of old items, they were also part of a frugal set of eight, two boxes of four. So now we’re down to seven. “We should have bought twelve in the first place”, I mutter. “We were […]

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Stuck in the Middle

This month I will be thirty seven. I am not exactly middle aged, more’s the pity, because at least then I could eschew every clubbing night out to work my way through the Desert Island Discs archive while spending Sundays meeting a friend for a coffee in my local garden centre. Sadly, I am only the fringes of middle age. I am stuck in some horrendous flabby middle ground, the […]

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Bread

I’m standing in Waitrose feeling hungry. “Are you hungry for some lunch?” I ask my husband nonchalantly. I have no doubt he will say yes. His greed is something of folklore across a number of counties and I feel sure he will humour me and furnish us with a chicken, glistening with extra fat thighs. I cannot make this kind if purchase on my own. I lack the confidence to […]

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